I’m a stickler for details; I can’t stop my analytic neurons firing, causing me to judge something before I decide if I even like it or not. If it isn’t logical, if it doesn’t make sense and match up, it’s automatically bunk, no matter how much I might actually enjoy it. Period. No forgiveness. Proof is nothing but the way you spin statistics. My favorite example of this is the SuperSize me experiment – it doesn’t take a genius to recognize that if you eat nothing but fast food for 30 days, you’re probably not going to lose weight. But what about the other side? What if he had eaten fast food once a day for 30 days while maintaining his daily regimen, which included working out? Now, I’m not saying he wouldn’t have developed the same health issues (increased cholesterol and what not), I’m just saying he only presented one side. Once I realized that, I disregarded everything he was trying to accomplish; it didn’t fit my logic.
I’m no stickler for rules, mind you – I bend rules all the time! I’m known around the office for talking my coworkers into, or out of, what sometimes amounts to life-altering decisions based on which way they really want to be swayed; I should have been a lawyer, really. Where am I going with this? Precisely here: at first, I thought I would have a set of rules to follow on my trek across the greater metropolitan double-H area – things like “if they offer a special, I have to try it” or “if there’s a house red I have to order it” – but the more I thought about it, the more I realized there would never be a fair comparison – grape to grape, shall we say – of the beverages or food offered on the myriad of menus across endless establishments.
The delicate balance of cause and effect, inverse proportions, and negative relationships must be maintained, and I must step up to the challenge. There will be, however, one substantial exception to my rule of no rules; one aspect that bridges all: I must post my entry immediately upon final consumption, whether my state of inebriation registers affectless, tipsy, or thoroughly sloshed. Beyond this tenet, I will live in the moment, allowing the spirit of the almighty happy hour guide me through each excursion on my quest to bring you the hottest bargains, beverages, and yarns.
